If a girl falls in the rain, does anyone see it?

A few weeks ago, I bought some brand new classic skis from the Nordic Shop in Squamish. Yesterday morning, I woke up super early with the plan of taking O cross country skiing, to finally break in the new skis. No matter that it was pissing down rain, I was committed. So I packed everything in the car and agreed to drop off the man at ski school on the way (he's a ski instructor). Halfway there, he said something about skis and I realized, "Oh shit! My new skis aren't fastened into the ski rack!". The man opened the sun roof, slammed shut the ski rack, and all was good. Although I did receive a lecture about making sure all equipment is secure before driving away.

So I took O to Whistler's Meadow Park and went cross country skiing for the second time ever in my life. And his. O ran around the parking lot for twenty minutes while I figured out how to put the damn skis on. Thank goodness no one was there to see me. I was seriously convinced for a while that the bindings / boots were broken. Finally, we were ready to go. O looked so excited, because skis usually mean speed. But there was nothing fast about that ski expedition. I must have fell over at least four times. Eventually, O looked bored and we headed back to the car, where he met another dog. Finally, he got to run around at top speed. Hopefully next time will be better!

An early morning ski

This morning, I used my new-found wake-up-early abilities learned at the Avalanche course to get out of bed before the crack of dawn. It was so early that even the dog was still asleep, curled up on the bed, looking warm and comfy.

Quick breakfast for both of us and then I strapped my skis to my back, grabbed O's leash, and started hiking up the road in my ski boots, head lamp leading the way through the dark and quiet streets.

At the top of the road, I reached the Bear River ski out, slapped the skins on my skis and started touring up the trail. O loved it, dashing in and out of the woods on either side of me, excited to be making paw prints on freshly fallen snow.

And then it was time to head back down. O running ahead of me, leaping out of the snow like a deer, and then running full-speed to keep up as I ski past him, excited that I am the faster one for once.

Time to pack it in?

I'm not even sure if anyone ever reads these posts except me. It feels like I'm sending random words off into space, hoping that some day long in the future, someone will know what I thought and felt.

I didn't pass my CAA Level 1 Ops course. And I feel upset, sad, disappointed, and like a big pile of shit. My boyfriend passed. And I'm trying to be happy for him. But he's on his way to Bellingham for the night, with a big day of skiing planned at Baker for tomorrow. So tonight will be just me and the dog and a big bottle of wine.

I failed the snow pit portion. It's possible to retest, as long I do it before the end of next year. And I was given some helpful feedback. But that means a lot of digging practice and the whole effort of traveling somewhere to show I actually know how to conduct a snow profile. I just wish the outcome had been different.

I feel tired of this whole Whistler thing. Tired of the snow and of skiing and trying to make a life in a place where I might not actually belong. Maybe I should just pack it all in and move home. Back to Nova Scotia. Back to a place where I know everyone, where I can see my family whenever I want, where I work a normal Monday to Friday, 9-5 job and go skiing at a little ski hill on weekends and maybe a big ski trip once a year. Or maybe no skiing at all? What is this god-damned obsession with skiing?

Photo credit: vikush

So tired & head is full of avalanche knowledge

I have two days left on my Level 1 Ops course. We have been out on the mountain every day, touring, digging snow pits, and trying to cram as much knowledge in our heads as possible. I am exhausted. Legs and arms hurt. So tired, but going to sleep means time not spent studying or practicing transceiver searches.

I've learned so much over the past few days, and really feel a lot more comfortable going out on the mountains. Not sure if I've learned enough yet for the tests at the end of the week?

Skiing has been great. For some reason, I felt really nervous the first day or two (had to do with me tweaking my knee first turn of the course) but now starting to get some good turns and getting that surfboard feeling under my skis.

Today I built my first ever pit, and did a pretty good job (although the instructor did help with some of the digging). Starting to actually see what's going on with snow layers, crystal formations. Not sure if I'll ever really like peeing in the snow. I'm sure everyone's seen my bare butt by now.

So tired, contacts are sticking to my eyeballs. Not even able to type coherent paragraphs, although the sentences still seem okay. Time to do some more summaries of the day's observations, pack my bag, and head to bed.